And another thing...

Why is that man shopping for his wife's Christmas present at Lowe's? Shopping for his dad, yes I could totally buy that. But his wife? No wonder he doesn't end up with anything but a gift card. And you know what she's going to use that gift card for? Probably to buy his next birthday present. That's the kind of store you only buy something for your wife in if she has specifically requested a gift that you can only find at Lowe's. It's like buying your wife a vacuum or cookware. Unless she specifically asked for a vacuum or really loves cooking and has been dropping hints about a bright red KitchenAid mixer that would look great in my new kitchen, just don't do it. And certainly don't go wandering around the hardware store thinking you'll stumble upon something pretty. No one wants a chore for Christmas.